Sunday, April 20, 2008

Drake Bell makes me the best dad in the world

Madelin is 11 years old and has found the radio. She has been starting her mornings with a healthy dose of "cool" from the two morning hacks on Planet 94.1. I think the DJ's are Chris and Larae but I could be way off. Their careers are obviously blowing up since they can be heard almost to Hurricane every morning.
When I was Maddie's age I got my first " ghetto blaster" and would listen to Rock 103 with John Carter and Dan Bammes. In my 11 year old opinion those guys were the coolest cats on the planet. Everything they said was hilarious. To this day I would probably laugh at the bit they did on Magnabrau, goofing on the water that comes from Magna city or the Mr. Roberts Neighborhood sequels.
So when 94.9 announced that Drake Bell from was coming in concert Maddie was using every angle she could to finagle tickets. Every morning at 7:45 she would be working the phone for the free giveaway tickets. Needless to say she did not win so she moved on to begging Sarah and I. She had enough of her own money to pay for half of the ticket so I relented and Sarah was more than happy to let me go with her.
Here is a vid from Drakes newest album.

You that took the time to watch that piece of crap might be thinking; "he's not so bad." Well he is. Am I fine letting my daughter listen to him? Yes. Do I think his career will last another 20 minutes? No. According to Andy Worhol it's 14:55 and counting.

The concert was at Dixie college and was supposed to start at 7pm. According to Utah tradition at least half of the attendees showed up at 7:10. This is when the nightmare began, I believe that Dante's 3rd and 4th circles of hell were to be found in that arena. Mothers with 3-4 kids in tow ranging in ages from 2-13 moved through the building like a swarm of locusts devouring T shirts at $20, popcorn, soda, candy and the ubiquitous glow sticks could not be kept on the shelves. I am pretty sure the family of 5 sitting next to us spent more money than the payment on their double wide in Dixie Downs. The few Dads with daughters that I saw were a solemn group, we nodded one to another in silent appreciation of the others misery.

At 7:45 the prepubescent, preening, wanna be rock star finally graced the stage. The kiddies went crazy as he started his first song. Between the screaming and the horrible audio quality I wished for two ice picks, one for each ear. Honestly I don't know if the speakers were provided by the college or if Drake brought them himself but I am sure that they were original equipment that Cheap Trick used live at Budokan in 1976.

Here are some of the 40-odd photos that Madelin took during the show. Those of you with a more discerning eye can enjoy the composition and subtle use of lighting.

As you can see we moved around the arena to get all the angles. Maddie was amazed when I walked past the "security" and got us onto the floor. I gave the 20 year old manning the gate my patented " I dare you to stop me" look and he decided that it was not worth the $7.52 per hr they pay him.

On a side note; I took a trip to use the facilities and found this bit of comedy gold taped to the wall. Click on this picture for a close up.

More evidence that men should not be cheerleaders.
Two of the guys on the team have less hair than me. The dude in the glasses looks 40 and the 15 yr old kid right below him is flashing what could be gang signs. The girls look like cheerleaders, vapid and happy.
If you can also read under the general info heading they have recommendations for dress. I bet those guys look great in form fitted tops and shorts. No man should ever wear form fitted shorts.
Did anyone know that you had to have a letter of recommendation from 2 teachers to try out? And why should you have to pay $25 to try out? Maybe I should call Aaronee.

Back to the show, just as we made it to the floor he wrapped up his playlist and left the stage. All the kids started leaving, I told Maddie he would be right back for an encore and used the time to maneuver closer to the stage. Sure enough after 4 minutes he was back to finish us off with two cover songs. Mello Yellow and She ain't worth a dime. I am pretty sure I was the only person in the building that knew that the second selection was from the Stray Cats circa 1986. He played both very well which proved that he doesn't really suck as long as someone else writes the music.

Madelin loved every minute of it and I was careful to not let my true sentiments show thru my carefully crafted facade. The show only lasted an hour and in spite of my bad attitude I would do it again tomorrow to make my kids happy. In fact the next day I took all 3 girls sans Sarah to the kite festival which is a colossall waste of time and money unless you have kids that you want to make happy.


Sarah said...

You are Mr. Awesome. No doubt about it.

jen said...

What a nice dad! I think if I had won tickets (I don't know what I was thinking, but, I seriously tried) that Dallin would have happily opted to stay home with the baby.

cfduncan said...

How noble of you to duck so low as to hide behind that rosy facade whilst clearly being so far superior in musical talent to Mr Bell!
I think you are being a little unfair in your critique of his work; but no doubt are you the dawg when it comes to your kids -well done

If you would like a fan-mail address or details of how/where to request an autograph for your little girl e-mail me at, because while her father is a scathing fair weather music fan, your daughter sounds like a little sweetheart and you'd certainly be paid off once fathers-day comes around!


Barb & Sean said...

I am way out of it these days as to who's cool, so I read your blog and showed the pics & video to Raleigh & Jamison. They both said, "Oh, that's Drake from Drake & Josh!" And Jamison said, "But he doesn't play the piano (re: video); he plays the guitar." Shows how much I know. They were pretty green.

Barb & Sean said...

with envy, that is.

B& JWeston said...

I think you must be the best dad ever! I remember that I didn't ever go to a concert like this with any our 11. I did go to a chemistry demo up at the U and we did have some good family trips, but never a concert! Congratulations, and we enjoyed reading it - both yours and Sarah's blogs! Dad